B- 2 c coffee HC CO AS
(382 cals - 5.2 carbs)
SN (3pm) 1 oz Walnuts (190 cals - 2 carbs)
D- 6 oz sirloin steak ( 230 cals - 0 carb)
w/ 2 T. one carb catchup (10 cals - 2 carbs)
1 1/2 c Medley Veggies (carrots, Brocolli and cauliflower)
(60 cals - 6 carbs)
w/ 1 T. cheese whiz (45 cals - 2 carbs)
SN- 2 Russell Stovers SF toffee square (132 cals - 15.2 carbs)
Total carbs =32.4
I'm posting my response to yesterdays post.
I'm actually glad no one has noticed my weight loss yet. I remember a few years ago when I went for 311 to 230 (which was my lowest) when people started to noticed. I did not like it at all. I kind of feel like now, that may have been my down fall. It was early spring when people started to notice. I had been bundled up all winter, so no one really saw me without all my winter gear on. But when it came time to shed the extra clothes all of a sudden people noticed. I really think thats what did it for me. I didn't gain all the weight back, about 40 pounds or so. So now I'm dealing with getting close to that # again............
I'm ok with it though, I'm ready to go on and be comfortable with me. I guess now I know to prepare myself for the comments. So it was a learning experience. I just wish it hadn't taken me so long to be ready again. :(
After I posted this I thought about it more and more.
I need to do the mental work this time around. I've been trying to do this. But it is a long process.
I picked up the January 2009 issue of O magazine today. Oprah is talking about her recent weight gain and the troubles she has had in the past. In her reflection she says what she has learned this year is "My weight issue isn't about eating less or working out harder, or even about my malfunctioning thyroid. It's about my life being out of balance, with too much work and not enough play, not enough time to calm down, I let the well run dry." "I don't have a weight problem - I have a self care problem that manifest through weight." she also says "In order to not abuse food, I have to stay fully conscious and aware, of every bite, of taking time and chewing slowly. I have to focus on being fully alive, awake, present, and engaged, connected in every area of my life. Right now"
This just sent chills through me. I feel the EXACT same way right now. I know I have to stay VERY focused if I'm going to do this. But it does get exhausting. I think this is what happened a few years ago. I was so focused, that it didn't occur to me that other people would eventually notice. It's a personal issue with me. I want to work on me without the whole world knowing. But, like Oprah my issues manifest through weight. Eventually people are gonna notice, like it or not. I just need to be prepared for it.